While the current Indian social and news media is focused on the recent controversies surrounding the lack of outrage in India after the Assamese Gang Rape case , my fellow friend academic and colleague is making a great contribution to a wonderful organization that supports the rehabilitation of widows barring race, religion, cultures, and class to give them a chance to start their new lives in a country where the status of women is constantly called into question especially in the eyes of the international (and local media). Feminists and non-feminists are focused on attacking each other rather than trying to spend time and work together to come up with a solution to eradicate or at the very least alleviate the issue of women's inferior status in India altogether.While I have focused on troubling issues that Indian (middle class) women are facing currently, there are also marked efforts being made by individuals whose efforts go unrecognized but play such an important role in contributing to some sort of a "progress" towards the status of women in India. As an Indian woman, I am critical of the discourse both academic and non-academic that constantly emphasizes that countries like India and Middle East are misogynistic and continue to enact systems of oppression that suppress women and take away their rights as human beings. Among the women who suffer from these conniving and "evil" misogynistic hands are widows. Widow remarriage is a topic that has always sparked a controversy in the Indian discourse both in popular culture but also in the social media that seeks to define boundaries for women who are living without men in their lives. The Tanishq Ad that sought to break taboos was for me one of the first glimmer of hope that people were now seeking answers for this problematic tradition that essentially annihilated the subjectivity of women after the (untimely) death of her husband. Like single women who are mostly unrecognized in the society, a widow in India especially lives a life that is a constant reminder of the loss of her husband - she is always clad in white (that is emblematic of her [sexual] purity) and no longer wears jewelry and other symbols that show her living a vibrant life! Films like Baabul (2006) and Water (2005) have played a profound role in honing on this issue and beg us to take a look at them once again and ask the question - does not a widow have the right to remarry? I would argue - yes - she does! I applaud the efforts made by Dr. Mohini Giri and her intern, Melanie Walker who is not only a close friend but who is contributing immensely to the service.
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| Melanie and I at the South Asian Studies Conference in Claremont, CA
We had met by chance at the South Asian conference in Claremont University, California in 2011. I was working in EMC at that time but was passionate about my career in academia so I had applied for a conference and with my own funding had gone to the conference and it rightfully changed my life (but that's another story for another day!) In any case, the conference became a forum where I met many wonderful scholars who have stayed in touch and have been supportive. Among them, I met Melanie Walker.
So now that I know that she is achieving great heights, she had to be featured in my blog because both her work and contribution are evidence that while there may be concerns regarding a woman's subjectivity in India, there are also groundwork efforts being done by individuals and organizations that are providing resources for women to have a better life. There is a glimmer of hope and The Guild For Service and Melanie Walker's work and contribution is a great and profound contribution to this thought!
So without further delay, I introduce Melanie Walker to you:
Nidhi Shrivastava: How and why did you select The Guild for Service as an organization that you
wanted to work for?
Melanie Walker: To be honest, it selected me. I’m
here under extreme happenstance! Well, I was connected to the Guild for Service and Dr. Giri under happenstance;
the rest was up to me. It is one of those, “you never know who you are going to
meet” stories. I met Dr. Giri’s Niece, Nalini while working an open house for
my Uncle while in California in September. My Aunt was ill that day, so he
chose to stay home and asked me to fill in and support his business partner,
Susan, where needed. Nalini works in the same real estate office as my Uncle
and Susan, and stopped by the open house. Susan introduced us and shared some
of my history, having done research in India, and it only took a minute to not
only realize that we had a lot in common, but Nalini asked me if I knew of her
aunt, Dr. Mohini Giri, and of course I did. Not only had I heard of Dr. Giri,
but, had done a presentation in grad school on a movie she is represented in
(Forgotten Women) and discussed her work to my students in Development Studies
lectures at the University of Calgary.
Nalini said that I
should reach out to Dr. Giri mentioning our shared connection - I told her I
would love to, being that I was post-grad and searching for an internship
opportunity in an organization that supported my values in community development
- a rights based approach. Dr. Giri and Guild for Service focus on the plight
and rights of widows in India through advocacy, activism, and participatory
outreach. I knew that it would be important to follow through, even if just to
be a supporter. However, after some emails, phone calls (with Dr. Giri herself!
- this was very exciting at the time!), and further endorsement from Nalini,
Dr. Giri looked into my background and being satisfied, offered me an
internship and told me to come to India. I applied for my Visa the next day.
NS:What was your inspiration to work in the organization? I know
earlier you had done a lot of work in the development work that included
helping those who were most affected by the dam politics (If I remember
correctly 2 years ago)
MW: You are correct. My previous
research and advocacy work was within the umbrella of community development, focusing
on displaced indigenous populations due to dam building in India. Though the
concentration of my work is on rural India, indigenous populations, dams, and
specifically development induced displacement (DID), the premise of mine, and
Dr. Giri’s work is participatory community development, capacity building, and
rights based. Our goal is to advocate for those without a voice; include
marginalized populations in the fight to be heard, increasing their human
rights awareness and education; therefore, allowing people to be the agents of
change - changing policy and societal mindsets.
My inspiration came
from knowing that I valued and supported the work I would be doing. I would be
a part of something that was already creating change, and had been for years.
Of course, part of my inspiration was being given the chance to intern under a
legend. Dr. Mohini Giri is one of the leading social activists and human rights
advocates in India, if not the world, especially when it comes to the topic of
widows. Her connections lead to UN Women, she was nominated for the Nobel Peace
Prize, and sits on the board of numerous organizations, such as The Hunger
Project in New York. With her background, experience, and reputation, how could
one not be inspired to work with her? It was an opportunity I had to take and
was privileged to receive. Maybe I’ll have to write a book? - Behind the Scenes
of a Legend - haha!
NS: Knowing how unsafe arguably Delhi is right now for women of
all ages, races, and skin color, how are your adjusting yourself to the
environment? (this is optional/ mostly I am curious)
MW: Haha - you should ask this first
question to my family - you would get an intense response! Yes, over the past
while if you watch the news and/or any medial outlets, including social media,
you might think that once you arrive in Delhi you will be raped, and later
murdered. However, I believe that anything can happen to anyone, anywhere, and
at any time. This is my fourth time to India, which may allow me to connect to
the real Delhi on a better level, outside of what’s shown on TV. I first came
to Delhi in 2008 to attend the University of Delhi, returned in 2010 for a
research study group, and again in 2011 to conduct research for my MA Thesis. I
have been in Delhi during other significant events, such as terrorist attacks
and/or bombings, and thus have first hand experience of media portrayal versus what’s actually
happening on the ground. In my experience media uses a close-up vision of an
occurrence. However, the occurrence will be in one small section/area of a
city, so I won’t go there - or I will use extra caution and common sense. For
example, now more than ever I do not go out after dark in Delhi, unless I am
with someone(s) I trust and know well. I also stay away from areas that are known
for political rally’s etc. Although, the other day I attended a Violence
Against Women protest and ran smack into a huge (mainly male) intensely
political rally - these are not the best situations for visible foreigners, so
I got out of there quickly - this is part of the work and job of an advocate
and activist and are bound to happen. I’m not suggesting that violence such as
rape and murder in Delhi are impervious to me, not at all, just that the media
portrayal has painted Delhi as a “rape city” and yet is so much more. It’s got
a bad rap and I could get hurt/harmed just as easily elsewhere if I’m not
smart, safe and aware - this is the world we unfortunately live in, and that’s
what Dr Giri and others are trying to change!
NS: How did you meet Dr. Giri?
MW: The first time I
“met” Dr. Giri was when her niece (re: previous story) Nalini had me contact
Dr. Giri on the phone while she was visiting her daughter in Michigan. I was
nervous. I mean who just calls up a legend?! I had a good breakfast and asked
everyone in the house to leave - haha! She of course was completely laid back
and lovely - she is a very busy woman, so was to the point and had questions
about my work and qualifications, but was so accommodating and welcoming in her
offer of internship that I hung up the phone elated and maybe a little stunned!
I met her in person upon arriving at the Working Women’s Hostel where I am
staying, which is also run by Guild for Service and the location of the main
office where I work - my commute is very long - two flights of stairs. From the
moment I met her she was just as lovely as on the phone, we had tea and got to
know each other. Since, I’ve been here two weeks now, she has taken me under
her wing and invited me to follow her along in her work, in which I am learning
so very much, getting a glimpse behind the scenes.
NS: What was the experience like to witness the widow
remarriages? Do you remember any anecdotes or stories the women told?
MW: The Group Marriage totaled 15 couples, of which five were widow
re-marriages. It was incredible to witness; this was due to the details covered
by Guild for Service and Ma Dham (Vrindavan). Staff, volunteers, and Ma’s
(widows) living at Ma Dham, decorated the grounds beautifully. The Ma’s
especially were so excited for the event because it was the first Group
Marriage at Ma Dham, previously they were held in Delhi. They prepared
marigolds and other auspicious elements while singing, dancing and chattering
excitedly, working together in circles. Brides received full dress and adornment,
which added to the experience and excitement that this was a real wedding. I
had time to talk to some of the brides and one in particular was so excited to
get married that she took me over and proudly introduced me to her bridegroom;
they were an adorable couple. Her sister, mother and father were also there and
had the same expression of any parents on their daughters wedding day; this was
especially heartwarming to see in India because a wedding can be a mournful
time for a bride as she leaves her family and embarks to live with her husbands
family, seeing her own family less. Norms are changing, if slowly, due to the
advocacy work Dr. Giri and others do, creating awareness of women’s human
rights, and the importance of gender equality.
NS: What are the future events that will be conducted with Guild
for Change? What is it that you like most of the organization?
MW: We are
currently working on a three-part South Asian conference series on the Empowerment
of Widows, which would include attendees/speakers from all of the SAARC countries
and bring together SANWED members. The first phase would be a conference in
Delhi where discussion/workshops would lead to recommendations required for a
change towards the empowerment of widows. The second phase would be to take
those recommendations/document to the 58th session of the Commission
on the Status of Women (March 10-21, NY) as hosted by the UN-NGO branch. The
third phase would be to begin implementation at the grassroots level of such
recommendations, starting June 23 - the International Day of Widows. We are
currently at the funding stage, have confirmed one sponsor, and are working to
find additional funders for the project.
What do I like most...I think it’s the motivation I gain by
working in the field. Working on such causes from Canada is removed and it’s
easy to go home at the end of the day and go about your life, and although
work-life balance is important, working on the ground makes it real. Very.
Real. Without being removed from the issue time becomes rapid - things must
change now and you must work hard to do that. Sometimes the results are
instant, which makes you work harder because you want to see increased change.
Increased change = increased motivation. Community development, advocacy, and
activism can be exhausting and de-motivating on the best of days. Though what I
like most is also the most challenging part of my internship, it’s also the
lesson everyone in the field must experience. I am lucky enough to have this experience
with an organization and group of individuals that are hard working and truly believe in what they seek out to do each
day.
So...there you have it! I will be in India next month and will document and hope to do a follow-up blog with Dr. Mohini Giri and my dear friend, Melanie Walker - so proud of you!
Image sources: courtesy of Melanie Walker and Facebook
© Nidhi Shrivastava 2014 This content is subject to copyrights. Please ask for my permission before using this content for any purpose. |
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